Christmas Present Conundrum (Courtney's Crisis)
Crap! I forgot to get him something this year! How fast does Amazon ship? What do I do? Where do I start? Maybe this CD? How ‘bout this color chart? Maybe this stupid stamp so he can cover his stuff in wax bees! No, I’ve got to go deeper I’ve got to think smart What was it he was saying I should know it by heart If only it was so easy If I wasn’t so busy It wouldn’t have slipped my mind And I wouldn’t have fallen so far behind Look, look, look, there’s got to be something Can I have some more cream? And an extra shot of caffeine It would really mean a lot to me It’s been a long day Allison: Hey weirdo, how’s it going? Courtney: Not awesome, I totally forgot to get my hubby something for Christmas Allison: Geez, why’d you wait so long? Courtney: Well… I had so much going on this year Too much of people wanting their fill Birthdays, Weddings and Baby Showers too I totes forgot about my him Allison: Oh! You could cook him a nice dinner! Courtney: Yeah! Sit him down at the table Go to the kitchen and pull out the meal from the oven Whisk it out gently Place it on his plate Then just take it to him With a smile On my face Courtney: He’s not a “foodie”. He’d be totally fine if he could eat cereal for every meal Allison: Oh, well, that sucks… you could get him a gift card? Gift cards, nothin’ but plastic Don’t know what he wants, what he needs, what’ll make him complete Rollin’ to the store, near in the front, next the checkout Gamestop (for dem games) Barnes and Nobles (for dem books) I could get him a 50 dolla Starbucks card, but he’d only spend it on hot chocolate What ‘bout a Walmart card (shop dem groceries) Pack da bag full of dranks Side of chips Full of swag Nah, these plastic cards are not the best for expressing what’s close to chest “What are you gonna do?” “Are you really gonna mess this up?” “You should be able to find something he'd love” “He's not that hard to pick for” “You’re so stupid for forgetting this year!” “He’s gonna hate you!” “No he won’t” “He loves making music!” David: Okay hunny, I know I didn’t really get you anything last year, but THIS year I really thought outside the box. I got you the gift, of song! Merry Christmas Hunny Merry Christmas babe I love you so stinkin’ much It makes my belly ache Courtney: Wow… Awesome. Anyway, I know how much you love music and love playing with new toys. So, I got you this foreign speak n’ spell. But, for some reason they spelled it with a ‘G’ David: Tha… that’s a glockenspiel… but, sweet!
Submitted by SerpentEve — Jun 15, 2026